For most of my life I have been eating foods that made me feel better. I had no idea that those very same foods played havoc on my body later on.
My interest in food sensitivity started with my son who was an asthmatic in his early years. Back in the early 60's most doctors did not believe nor want to believe in allergists. But when my son begged to God to help him breath, I took him to the emergency room where they medicated him for relief.
Putting pressure on our Pediatrician to get my son to an allergist was the smartest thing we did. It was there he was tested for food sensitivity and was not allowed to eat the many pleasures that children love. Ice cream, pizza, milk, diary products, tomatoes, oranges, and chocolate
When I sent him to sleep a way camp, I notified the camp director of his restrictions. They could not figure out what to feed my son for lunch. I told them they would have to get him cold cuts.
Prior to his restrictions of those foods, he was always very irritable. I could not understand why he was that way. When he continued on his restricted diet, his asthma went away or was arrested as they say. He turned to be a happy well adjusted child. Until we moved a few years later....
As soon as our furniture arrived in our new home, he started wheezing. New to the community and not knowing anyone, I chose the nearest allergist. I wanted to prevent another attack. To my dismay, this guy did not believe in tests claiming that it is not the same thing as when food is digested. He said to my son, "you can eat what ever you like from now on." I was so upset, while my son was rejoicing.
Gradually he became irritable again, with massive head aches occurring often. His asthma was still arrested, however I feared the worst that it might come back. It was very difficult for us to live with him as he was now a very unmanageable teenager.
One day, driving in my car, listening to WOR, Carlton Fredericks, world renowned nutritionist, was speaking about a case he had. I will never forget the scenario. A mother called up on the air saying that her son was diagnosed as schizophrenic. "Bring the boy to my office before you do anything. Take his lunch and his favorite drink so I can evaluate him. I bet it has to do with something he ate" The mother thinking it might be a waste of time and foolishness, went along with it.
On visiting with Dr Fredericks, the young boy seemed very normal and well behaved. The Doctor was sitting at his desk while the mother and son was opposite him. Questions were asked and a conversation began. The boy was very well mannered and answered all the questions put to him. The Doctor. instructed him and the mother to start eating their sandwich and Coke as it was lunch time.
They continued to chat getting the family history. With approximately a half an hour after they finished their lunch, the boy became cranky and wanted to go home. "It is not time yet, we still have some more work to do" the doctor said. The boy became very irritable and within minutes he started to have a tantrum kicking and swinging.
Dr. Carlton Fredericks said, "you see what is happening, do you see this, your son is not a schizophrenic, he is severely allergic to the coke. Discontinue that and he will be a normal child again"
After listening, I tried to get an appointment with him for my son. I was referred to Dr. Michael Schachter MD. who studied with Fredericks. I knew what my son was allergic to, however because my son was a teenager, he had to see for himself and obtain another doctor's opinion. He was definitely in agreement about how foods affect him. He told my son to continue with his previous restricted diet.
Reflecting back when my son was an infant, he was always irritable with colic. Then eczema broke out on his face when he was one years old. At the age of two he developed Hay Fever. Asthma followed after age three. This whole process was food sensitivity. The doctors never told me about this until Dr Schacther and one of our allergists mentioned it to me when asthma set in. It was a shame all this could have been avoided.
In my next issue I will tell you about how to test your food sensitivity by yourself painlessly with the help of your spouse, partner or friend.
Today my son is an adult and understands how bad certain foods affect him. He continues to learn about food sensitivity and how some of the other foods contain poison which most of us unknowingly are feeding our children
Please watch this very short video especially if you are a parent
WHAT ARE THE BAD FOODS OUR CHILDREN ARE EATING
Showing posts with label BEHAVIOR PROBLEMS. Show all posts
Showing posts with label BEHAVIOR PROBLEMS. Show all posts
Wednesday, September 22, 2010
Wednesday, September 1, 2010
FAVORITISM AND SIBLING RIVALRY
Why do some siblings part ways with each other in adulthood? Why do some take each other to court using up most of their inheritance for legal fees?
Unfortunately there are a few friends of mine and some relatives who are distant from their siblings. Some have not spoken to each other in 25 years. As an only child, I would cherish a sibling. Knowing the families of my friends and relatives, I came to the realization that their parents, not knowingly, were at fault in causing the friction .
Children are born innocent and have a will to love. They need the love, attention and nurturing equal to their siblings. Parents know this and have always planned on being fair and loving with all their children, equally giving them the same attention and love their children deserve.
What they did not realize was life experiences that come up every day. A parent with a disabled child for example gives more attention to him, than the healthy sibling. Although the disabled child got more attention and affection, he is still jealous of his healthy sibling. The healthy child hurts more. He lacked the love, affection and attention because the sick child needed his parents more. You would think that the healthy child understood this. In his young mind, he felt unloved, and lacked the attention. His self esteem deepens as well as his resentment to his sibling.
Children, sometimes see and hear differently. For example. When a parent is angry and yells at a child, the child does not realize he is doing anything wrong. His mind thinks that the scolding is because he is unloved.
Many years ago I took a valuable study course about how to deal with a difficult child. The program was called "PARENT STEP MODIFICATION" One of the major things I remembered from the program before scolding my child was to say " I LOVE YOU" first. I know it sounds silly, but it works. They hear those words and then they understood that even though mother or dad was scolding them, they were still loved. This is very important because it adds to their self esteem. When a child gets scolded often because of discipline problems, his self image gets worse as he becomes a teen and into adulthood.
Parental differential treatment is the degree to which parents treat each child in the family differently. Studies have found that most parents report that they have to be a different parent to each of their children (Dunn and Plomin 1990; McGuire 2002). For instance, parents often indicate that one child needs more attention compared to the siblings. This does not necessarily mean that one child is being favored over the others. Parents who love their children equally may treat them differently to help each child develop properly. Favoritism is a specific type of differential treatment; it occurs when one child receives more positive treatment (e.g., more affection or more toys) compared to his or her siblings. However this is confusing to a child way into his adulthood. The child sees differential treatment as favoritism
Studies of families in the United States and Great Britain have shown that parental differential treatment is linked to children's temperament characteristics. For instance, emotional children tend to receive more attention from their parents compared to their calmer siblings. Parents also respond to each child's age, sex, and, sometimes, position in the family (that is, birth order). For example, parents do not expect the same degree of obedience from a one-year-old child and her three-year old brother. It is considered standard for parents to react to children's unique personalities and different developmental levels.
Parental differential treatment is also associated with children's behavior problems, at least in Western societies. Children who receive more parental discipline and less parental warmth relative to their sibling have more adjustment problems compared to children in other family environments. It cannot be assumed that parental differential treatment always causes children's adjustment problems, because children who are disruptive often elicit negative parental behavior. Researchers have examined families over time; findings from these studies suggest that both the parents and the children contribute to this family dynamic (Reiss et al. 2000).
When you have children with no health issues, it is easier to concentrate on being a fair parent.
What about happy childhoods however later when a parent dies, one sibling is left more than the other? A parent may rationalize thinking one child needs more than the successful sibling. or one child takes more care of a parent than the other. Another problem, one child is the trustee,the other siblings are not.
So what do these adult siblings do now? How can they ever reconcile? How can their hurt be erased. Too many years have gone by but never too late to heal.
Do the parents bring the siblings together and apologize for their unfairness?
Do they explain there was no manual on how to deal with problems of raising children?
Does the handicap sibling apologize for taking the attention away from his sibling?
Should the healthy child apologize to the handicap child for his selfishness of wanting more attention?
What suggestions can you offer to help those who are still hurting
How can siblings stop fighting?
There are many people who would love to hear your comments
Please feel free to comment below
Unfortunately there are a few friends of mine and some relatives who are distant from their siblings. Some have not spoken to each other in 25 years. As an only child, I would cherish a sibling. Knowing the families of my friends and relatives, I came to the realization that their parents, not knowingly, were at fault in causing the friction .
Children are born innocent and have a will to love. They need the love, attention and nurturing equal to their siblings. Parents know this and have always planned on being fair and loving with all their children, equally giving them the same attention and love their children deserve.
What they did not realize was life experiences that come up every day. A parent with a disabled child for example gives more attention to him, than the healthy sibling. Although the disabled child got more attention and affection, he is still jealous of his healthy sibling. The healthy child hurts more. He lacked the love, affection and attention because the sick child needed his parents more. You would think that the healthy child understood this. In his young mind, he felt unloved, and lacked the attention. His self esteem deepens as well as his resentment to his sibling.
Children, sometimes see and hear differently. For example. When a parent is angry and yells at a child, the child does not realize he is doing anything wrong. His mind thinks that the scolding is because he is unloved.
Many years ago I took a valuable study course about how to deal with a difficult child. The program was called "PARENT STEP MODIFICATION" One of the major things I remembered from the program before scolding my child was to say " I LOVE YOU" first. I know it sounds silly, but it works. They hear those words and then they understood that even though mother or dad was scolding them, they were still loved. This is very important because it adds to their self esteem. When a child gets scolded often because of discipline problems, his self image gets worse as he becomes a teen and into adulthood.
Parental differential treatment is the degree to which parents treat each child in the family differently. Studies have found that most parents report that they have to be a different parent to each of their children (Dunn and Plomin 1990; McGuire 2002). For instance, parents often indicate that one child needs more attention compared to the siblings. This does not necessarily mean that one child is being favored over the others. Parents who love their children equally may treat them differently to help each child develop properly. Favoritism is a specific type of differential treatment; it occurs when one child receives more positive treatment (e.g., more affection or more toys) compared to his or her siblings. However this is confusing to a child way into his adulthood. The child sees differential treatment as favoritism
Studies of families in the United States and Great Britain have shown that parental differential treatment is linked to children's temperament characteristics. For instance, emotional children tend to receive more attention from their parents compared to their calmer siblings. Parents also respond to each child's age, sex, and, sometimes, position in the family (that is, birth order). For example, parents do not expect the same degree of obedience from a one-year-old child and her three-year old brother. It is considered standard for parents to react to children's unique personalities and different developmental levels.
Parental differential treatment is also associated with children's behavior problems, at least in Western societies. Children who receive more parental discipline and less parental warmth relative to their sibling have more adjustment problems compared to children in other family environments. It cannot be assumed that parental differential treatment always causes children's adjustment problems, because children who are disruptive often elicit negative parental behavior. Researchers have examined families over time; findings from these studies suggest that both the parents and the children contribute to this family dynamic (Reiss et al. 2000).
When you have children with no health issues, it is easier to concentrate on being a fair parent.
What about happy childhoods however later when a parent dies, one sibling is left more than the other? A parent may rationalize thinking one child needs more than the successful sibling. or one child takes more care of a parent than the other. Another problem, one child is the trustee,the other siblings are not.
So what do these adult siblings do now? How can they ever reconcile? How can their hurt be erased. Too many years have gone by but never too late to heal.
Do the parents bring the siblings together and apologize for their unfairness?
Do they explain there was no manual on how to deal with problems of raising children?
Does the handicap sibling apologize for taking the attention away from his sibling?
Should the healthy child apologize to the handicap child for his selfishness of wanting more attention?
What suggestions can you offer to help those who are still hurting
How can siblings stop fighting?
There are many people who would love to hear your comments
Please feel free to comment below
Subscribe to:
Comments (Atom)
