Friday, October 15, 2010

MY EULOGY FOR MARILYN J. BERMAN

EULOGY FOR MY DEAR FRIEND MARILYN

About 37 years ago, I met Marilyn in the model of Fairhaven, a new development at that time.

It seemed we both contracted for the same lot. She thought there was going to be an argument. However looking into her beautiful blue eyes, we just chose another lot around the corner from her.

We became good friends when we moved into Birchwood Bungalow Colony waiting for our new houses to be built. Because we lived in close quarters, we became family, sharing car pools to school, vacationing and having holiday dinners together. It was thrilling watching Jenine, Stacey and Rodger grow up to become beautiful and productive people. Marilyn was always proud of her children and her children were always very caring and loving to her.

We had history together and sometimes we laughed at ourselves when we  reminisced the silly things we did.. Like the time we went to the mall, riding the escalators gabbing, going up, and going down, then going up and down again still chatting away. Like the blind leading the blind

Marilyn was determined to further her education and graduated college while her children were young. She loved her studies and discussed many of her classes with me. One special story she shared with me was from her classroom assignments . It was about a misdiagnosed autistic boy named Tibbs. I found it an excellent learning experience for anyone who read that book. I was extremely thankful to her for sharing.

During the years of our friendship, Marilyn often said to me that she hoped we remain good friends until we grew old and spend the rest of our time together in a nursing home. At that time we were in our thirties. I humored her while never giving my aging a thought. Unlike me, she always knew she would someday wind up in a nursing home.

Marilyn had a vision for her future. Perhaps watching her mother with the same illness and later her brother, she was so sure it would happen to her. And, when it did, she was so helpless with no cure in sight.

My friend Marilyn was very fortunate to live long enough to see her grown children and knowing her grandchildren. What is so great is that her grandchildren had the pleasure of knowing their wonderful grandmother. They gave her lots of Nachas and pleasure. She was very proud of all of them. Marilyn had comfort knowing that all her children had loving spouses and was proud of Itsik, Eli, and Rachael.

Most important, how lucky Marilyn was to have such a wonderful, loving and caring husband, especially to the end of her life.

Marilyn I will miss our laughs, your phone calls and your friendship. You will always be in my heart.

Rest in peace my dear friend.

5 comments:

t said...

YOUR EULOGY WAS BEAUTIFUL. PERFECTLY WORDED. MARILYN WAS A GENTLE SOUL.

I WANTED TO LEAVE A COMMENT ON YOUR BLOG BUT I DIDN'T WANT TO SIGN UP FOR GOOGLE.



T

iris said...

Foks, anyone who wishes to comment does not have to be a member of Google. Just put your name or ititial where it says name/url and publish after commenting

Anonymous said...

Marilyn had a good life with her husband Marvin the she deserved after a horrible childhood. The only thing is as far I can remember she was always in pain with Fiber Myalger. To bad she did not deserve that. Rst in piece Marilyn.
Lenny

Florence said...

I am heartbroken. I learned of Marilyn's passing from Sybil who telephoned me yesterday. Marilyn was always afraid of developing Alzeheimer's. When we used to walk on an almost daily basis and if Marilyn would forget somethin...g, she would say I hope I'm not getting it. I would try to put her mind at ease and tell her maybe she wouldn't develop it as one of her brother's had not developed it. I would tell her Alzeheimers is not forgetting where you put the pen down, but forgetting what the pen is for. Many, many times when a person fractures or breaks a hip it is because they are so frail and their bones are so weak. Marilyn was so frail. I heard that she was down to about eighty pounds. I saw her, I believe a year ago April at Stacy's house. I told her that when she came in again in June for her grandsons graduation to call me and that I would come see her again. The call never came. I expected it all that weekend and I was disappointed that I didn't get to see her again. I know that they were only in for the weekend. If the funeral was in New York I would definately be there. I am very, very saddened about Marilyn's passing. I pray her soul will rest in peace. It's hard for me to believe she is gone. Marilyn was a good person and we had gotten pretty friendly from walking together almost every day. When you see Marvin tomorrow please extend for me my deepest sympathy to him, Genene, Roger and Stacy and I will send something to Marvin. I will call Stacy when she gets back home. I sometimes bunk into her in Shoprite.

Florence said...

just read the eulogy you wrote about Marilyn and needless to say I have tears in my eyes. I have not stopped thinking about her. Marilyn and I were friends when our development was first new. I can recall her having a Halloween party and I dressed up as a boy scout. (I was so thin then I fit into Mike's old boy scout uniform. Mike went as John Knutson, the builder of our houses as everybody was after him. I remember everyone saying how clever Mike's costume was at the time. I remember bringing my stuffed cabbage as my contribution to the party. I also recall going to, I believe, Genene's Bat Mitzvah. I believe Marilyn had a tent for extra room. Then we lost touch for many years, except for on occasion meeting on the block or in Shoprite, etc. One fortunate day, many years later, I was in Macy's and Marvin walked by. We started talking and I said I was walking with a group of girls in the morning. Marvin said, Marilyn would like to walk. I said, have her call me and two days later it was the beginning of a new, dear friendship again. I was just talking about Marilyn this morning at the office with the head of the Planning Board. They knew Marilyn and Marvin from the group of parents with children living in Isreal